What does eye contact mean to a guy? Many things, actually…
He could be trying to tell you he finds you sexy…
…that he’s not into you…
…that he wants to #%@! you…
…that he doesn’t know how to express himself.
Rather than you struggling to try to interpret what a man is thinking when you make eye contact, here’s your guide.
Why You Should Care About What Eye Contact Means to a Guy
I’ll be the first to admit it: men aren’t always great at communicating what they want or are thinking with words. Or maybe it’s just that women are so much better at communicating (did you know you have more language protein than men??).
As a natural-born communicator, you use words and cues to understand the world around you. In dating, this can be frustrating, because you’re often not speaking the same language as men!
That’s where understanding eye contact comes into play. Say you’re interested in a guy, but you have no idea if he likes you too. You can, just by knowing how to read his eye contact, get the answer to that question.
Let’s look at different types of eye contact in different situations so you can better understand what a man is trying to communicate to you.
Before You Start Dating
This period is, for most women, the hardest to decipher. Every man is different, so he’ll communicate interest or attraction differently than the others. But the eyes don’t lie.
1. He Deliberately Makes Eye Contact
You’re at a party and lock eyes with a hottie. You blush and look away. Then sneak another peek. He’s still staring at you, with a slight smile.
What does that mean?
He’s interested. He’s making eye contact to communicate that he’s single and interested in getting to know you.
If, on the other hand, you lock eyes and then he looks away and doesn’t look again, it was probably just an accident. Move on.
2. You Catch Him Staring
Maybe you’re hanging out with your male BFF, and you catch him staring at you. It might not be because you have spinach between your teeth. In fact, there’s a good chance that
he’s interested…but is shy about confessing his feelings.
If he looks down after you catch him, that’s a body language sign that he’s into you.
Now you need to consider how you feel about him!
3. He Looks You Up and Down
Back to that party you were at. Another guy—one who maybe looks like he knows how gorgeous he is— looks you up and down with a cocky grin. Like he’s trying to undress you.
What does eye contact mean to a guy who does that?
I think you know.
He only wants sex. If he looks like a wolf at a lamb slaughter, this guy is not looking for a relationship.
4. The Doubletake
Let’s say at this party (hey, you look great. Don’t be shocked so many men are into you at this party!), a friend introduces you to a man. At first, he’s a bit unfocused, maybe distracted by all the music and people.
But then he does a doubletake. Just like in a cartoon.
When you meet a man, if he gives you the doubletake, he’s seeing something he likes. You have literally given him a reason to look again.
When You’re Dating
Okay, so maybe you navigated through the body language a man gave you before you started dating, but does it really get easier in those first few weeks to understand what a man’s eye contact is telling you?
5. He Averts His Eyes or Looks Elsewhere
You’re on a first date and despite the conversation going well, this man can’t seem to make eye contact. What gives?
Some men are shy, and eye contact is hard, especially when they don’t know you well. So don’t write him off right away.
However, if there are other signs that the date isn’t going great (he’s crossing his arms rather than leaning toward you, he’s not doing a lot to help the conversation along) and he doesn’t make eye contact often, he may not be into you.
6. He Can’t Stop Looking into Your Eyes
On the other hand, if this man’s eyes seem to be glued to yours…if you have trouble looking away yourself because his gaze is so intense, he’s falling.
It’s difficult to hide interest with the eyes. If his pupils dilate, he’s attracted to you.
7. He Gazes with a Smile and Leans Forward
This is also a good one because it’s combined with other types of body language that tell you he’s attracted to you.
If, on a date, he is not only gazing into your eyes but also smiling constantly and leaning his body toward yours, it’s a good sign.
When You’re in a Relationship
Once you’re in a relationship, you might find it easier to read your man, but there are times when he might be holding back. That’s when reading what his eyes tell you comes in handy.
8. He Closes His Eyes or Shifts Them
Your man came home waaay late last night, and this morning, you’re asking where he was. If he closes his eyes for a few seconds or shifts them away from you, whatever is about to come out of his face is a lie. Scientists have studied body language and have identified these as two indicators that someone isn’t being honest.
9. He Can’t Make Eye Contact
Once upon a time, this man couldn’t stop making puppy eyes at you, but after a few years together, you’re noticing that he rarely makes eye contact when you talk.
I’m sorry to say, but this might be an indicator that he may have fallen out of love with you or has a secret that he doesn’t want to share. It’s up to you what you do with this knowledge: pry it out of him or wait until he’s ready to talk?
10. He Looks at You Like He Did at the Start
On the other hand, if he’s still peering into your eyes as if he’s looking into the depths of your soul, he is still deeply, madly in love with you. Enjoy it, and show a little appreciation with your own eye-gazing!
Now that you can stop wondering: what does eye contact mean to a guy, you can start taking action on what you’ve learned here. If his eyes are giving you the green light, flirt a little. If they’re little stop signs, don’t let yourself get too attached. If you feel comfortable, take what his eyes are telling you to open up a conversation, particularly if you suspect his feelings have changed and you want to know what’s up.
Are you ready to make a man pursue you? Join this free webinar to discover how to use your eyes to make him chase you.