Learning to love is like learning to walk. You start out bewildered and curious. You watch the people around you moving about in such a magical way, and you want to do the same. You start to model your movements after theirs, but you always begin with a crawl.
Crawling means holding your own body up for the first time. You’re feeling confident. You’re traveling on your own. But, you can’t stand just yet. You can’t stand and risk falling until your brave little mind realizes you are already capable of moving on your own. When you stand and do start to walk, you fall.
You fall hard and often.
Sometimes you even revert back to crawling for awhile. You become discouraged or exhausted, and crawl around remembering you’re still capable of going anywhere. Eventually though, you do it. You master walking. You get strong. You get brave. You know you are in control. You knew you could crawl and move, so you then discovered you could do far more.
Love begins with a crawl and that crawl is the love you have for yourself.
When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Do you love the person staring back at you? Do you love the way your eyes light up with your smile? Do you love your talents, ambitions and beauties? Do you also love your flaws and weaknesses? Because if you don’t, how can you ever fully accept that from someone else?
How can you let yourself be loved if you haven’t loved yourself first?
Honest confidence radiates to every person you encounter. The people you date can sense it. They can feel it, drink it up and get drunk on the powerful entity that shines upon them. A love of self also demands that same standard of love from others. You couldn’t date people who treat you badly because you actually believe in what you deserve from others. You have to believe in yourself and your true value as a brilliantly unique and powerful human being.
When we date, we place this external focus on how we want others to view us, but the only focus we should have is how we view ourselves. It’s about believing in yourself. It’s about presenting a genuine and raw version of who you are because you’re not afraid of life’s most challenging and vigorous love affair, the one you have with yourself.
If we could all be happy being real with who we are and within ourselves, finding our way to one another wouldn’t be such a maze. As you date, and venture into excursions that evoke the deepest powers of your heart, remember the importance of fighting for your own love.
Take time for yourself.
Stand by your beliefs.
Demand respect and kindness.
Heal if you need to.
Show people who you really are.
It’s the only way to make dating a true and remarkable success. Be proud. Be brave. Be confident. Be in love with who you are and then let others fall in love with you.